Hello

Well look who finally decided to show up??

It's spring!

In NYC.

It's sunny.

And colorful.

And wonderful.

And fragrant.

And I love it.

Keep on singing,

Embarrassing? Yes. But Also Comforing.

It rarely happens anymore. Something about the combination of being daddy’s little girl and at the same time an almost “grown-up” has severely decreased the number of times I fight with my dad. In fact, this hardly counts as a fight. But he did make me cry. It was just one of those mornings. You know, the ones where nothing has gone terribly wrong but nothing has gone terribly right either? A morning that starts with tears at the edges of your eyes just waiting to spill over. All it takes is one, little phrase. “Goodness, no one is appreciative around here.”

He didn’t even mean it. He didn’t even remember saying it. But the jab struck the kink in my cheerful armor, and the tears that had been waiting to spill over began to flow. He didn’t notice (I didn’t really expect or want him to). But I turned quickly away hoping that if I continued on with my day the tears would stop. But there was a flaw in my plan.

Continuing on with my day meant going downstairs and seeing my mother. When asked what was wrong, I quickly explained but tried not to dwell on it. And I succeeded. By the time I walked out my front door to head to work, I had completely forgotten that a mere hour ago I had tears streaming down my face.

I work in for the Education Department of Nyack College Manhattan Campus. I love my job. I love my boss. I love having an excuse to spend five hours in the education lab people watching and chatting with college friends. I was having a good day. When my phone rang and the caller ID showed home, I answered with a cheery hello. “What’s up, daddy?” “Well,” he began hesitantly, “your mother says I made you cry this morning.”

Oh no. I had forgotten. I didn’t want to think about this now. “What?” I replied in a voice several octaves higher than normal. I quickly walked out of the lab to have some “privacy” for my phone call. I put privacy in quotes because what I apparently forgot at that moment is that the education lab has a wall of windows looking out into the hallway I had just walked to for “privacy.” I was proud of myself. I managed to get through the whole let’s-fix-this conversation without raising my voice or bursting into tears. But apparently I wasn’t as stone-faced as I thought. This probably has something to do with the fact that I did get a little teary and I’m rather expressive with my hand motions. . .

A walked back into the ed lab to be greeted by my two male friends questioning, “Are you okay? Was that your boyfriend?” I’m pretty sure if I’ve ever blushed, I was blushing then. “No, that was my dad, and I’ll be fine.” I replied quickly. “Oh, good. At first we were rooting for you to tell him off, but then we could tell you were upset. We were prepared to take care of it if you needed us too.”

Wow. It was one of those moments were you wish you could melt into the carpet. I was so embarrassed. Besides the fact that even if it had been my boyfriend he’s two hours away so what would they have done. . . But it was strangely comforting too. I haven’t made many close friends in college. But in the education department we are family. And apparently family does really stick together.

Keep on singing,

A Truly Blessed Ressurection Sunday

Saturday night, my dad asked me if I would like to dye some eggs to pair with peeps and make a centerpiece for our Easter dinner. I was all for it because I haven't dyed eggs since I was about ten. I had fun, but it would be a lot more fine if I had some little kids around with whom I could dye the eggs.





















All Saturday, it rained. Forecasts called for more rain and even thunderstorms Resurrection morning. My dad was all prepared to cancel the "Sonrise" service. When he awoke early Sunday morning, his computer forecast had a bright sun on it. He wasn't sure he believed it so he went out on the stoop to see what he could see. Sure enough, he saw the sun peeking through the clouds. We gathered in the park near our church to rejoice in the risen King then headed back to church for breakfast.




We had a great time of food and fellowship followed by a service with more joy in celebrating the resurrection. Pastor Lewis preached on what the resurrection means to Christians and how it affects our Christian walk.




It was a lovely day. Easter is almost my favorite holiday, second only to Christmas. And this year was even better than most!

















Keep on singing,

He is Risen!

"Now if Christ is proclaimed as raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? But if there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is in vain and your faith is in vain. We are even found to be misrepresenting God, because we testified about God that he raised Christ, whom he did not raise if it is true that the dead are not raised. For if the dead are not raised, not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied.
But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive.

Keep on singing,

While the sun's light failed . . .

The centurion saw what had taken place, and he praised God saying, "Truly this was the Son of God!"

What's Important to You?

“You always find time for what is important to you.”

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. ~ Ephesians 5:15-17

So what are you finding time for? I always find time for my family and friends. That’s points in my favor right? Perhaps, but if I’m honest with myself, I’d have to say that next thing on the list that I’m always sure to fit in is Facebook. Yeah, you can take those points back. . . And where does God fit into this? He gets shoved onto the subway car with me in the hopes that it’s not too crowded for me to get my Kindle Bible out of my bag. If He’s really lucky, when I’m finished reading the Bible, I may even swap it for a book about Him.

There. I said it. I take more time for Facebook than I do for God. But before you start judging me (though I’m every bit as guilty as you’re thinking, I’m sure), take a look at your life. What’s coming first for you?

I’m the last person who would ever declare Facebook evil. But I am willing to admit that it’s far from wholesome most of the time. Studies have shown that Facebook can improve self-esteem because it allows for “selective self-presentation.” “Social-network sites are designed to share information about the self with others, including likes/dislikes, hobbies, and personal musings via ‘wall posts,’ and ‘status updates’ . . . . exposure to information presented on one’s Facebook profile enhances self esteem, especially when a person edits information about the self, or selectively self-presents.” On the face of it, this article would seem to promote the use of social-networking sites. However, I see it a little different.

I may not have consciously known that every time I log onto my Facebook I’m getting and ego boost, but subconsciously that may very well be why I log in so often. By carefully selecting what we post on Facebook, we are crafting an airbrushed photo of ourselves to present to the world, and I’m not just talking about pictures. Our likes and status updates are all carefully chosen to present what we consider the ideal representation of ourselves.

No wonder I spend so much time on Facebook! It takes all the “praiseworthy” aspects of myself and displays them to a captive audience (captivated by their own Facebook) that is quick to openly praise (and not so openly judge). So when I spend time on Facebook, I’m really spending time on myself, feeding my ego – my pride.

By finding time for Facebook before I find time for God, I’m counting myself as more important than God. Excuse me while I go rethink my priorities . . .

Keep on singing,




Quotation from:
Gonzales, Amy L., and Jeffrey T. Hancock. "Mirror, Mirror on my Facebook Wall: Effects of Exposure to Facebook on Self-Esteem." CyberPsychology, Behavior & Social Networking 14.1/2 (2011): 79-83. Academic Search Premier. EBSCO. Web. 15 Apr. 2011.

2 Steps Forward, 1 Step Back

Every once in a while, I reach a point where I feel that I am really starting to make progress in a particular area of my life. I feel confident (perhaps even prideful) that I have moved passed this area of difficulty in my life. It is often when I reach this point that something happens to pull me back a little. Last December, I wrote a blog post about insecurity admitting that it was something with which I struggle. In the months that followed, I made great strides in that area. I began to live with the knowledge that “I need to stop finding joy in what others think of me and start finding joy in Him.” Reading the Psalms really helped with that. While the psalmist often struggled with feeling as though God had forsaken him, he also wrote many psalms that are completely and utterly joyful and worship full. (Side note: Let me just say, that it is pretty amazing to have a boyfriend that replies to your text about how crummy your day has been with a text saying something like, “I’m sorry you’re having a bad day. I wish I were there to make it better. Have you read your Bible today? Try the book of Psalms.” Yes, he’s that cool.)

I was just thinking the other day how truly freeing it is to live a life with very little insecurity. And then I had a dream. It was one of those dreams where you can’t remember exactly what happened, but you know how it made you feel. I woke up feeling completely worthless and unloved. And while I know that’s not true, the feeling was overwhelming. I pulled the covers over my head and curled into a ball trying to shake it off. The feeling was fading (perhaps if I had been awake enough to consider praying, it would have faded faster) when my mom called that the coffee was ready. Coffee!! I got up, pushing the feeling to the back of my mind. It stayed there till I got in the shower (come on, I know I’m not the only one who does some of their most intense thinking in the shower!). I realized why, on this particular day, I found these feelings so crippling. It was because I thought I was past this. I thought I had moved on to other struggles. Wrong. But how do you combat thoughts that assail you in your sleep? I have no idea. But I am confident in this very thing: His grace is sufficient for me, for His strength is made perfect in weakness. “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” For “the Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness; He will quiet you by his love; He will exult over you with loud singing.

Keep on singing,